a hundred degrees

Shoehorn with Teeth - Analysis

I looked at TMBG's site to see what had been written about this song by the fans who were trying to interpret it. I expected this to be dismissed as mostly obvious, but instead found that none of the commenters had gotten it right.

The song "Shoehorn With Teeth" describes a loudmouth simpleton who most obstinately refuses to deal with the fact that the world is a complex place.

"He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth." A weaker restatement might run, "He wants to pigeonhole with extreme prejudice." The point is that he has constructed for himself a simple, black and white, world-view. Facts and values are so self evident in his mind that there is no need to dispute them. Anyone who does so must be a peddler of perversity. Thus, "People should get beat up for stating their beliefs."

I imagine our protagonist as a radio talk show caller. The guest on the show is challenging the idea that the sky is blue. He further asserts that the sky is a fuzzy object whose boundaries are not clearly defined. Our caller reacts to this as if the guest had said that God was not fully revealed in the Authorized Version of the bible and available to anyone who would simply speak the sinner's prayer. "I think your guest is full of it. I've been looking at the sky my whole life. Some of the most beautiful things I've seen have been sunsets. I know where the sky is. I could point to the boundaries of the sky from every place I've ever been. The sky is something I can always count on to be there. Then you get some high and mighty scholar type who wants to try to talk about 'atmosphere.' I know there's no such thing, but it still wouldn't usually bother me that these so-called academics want to blab on an on, except that this show is on in the late afternoon and I know that some kids are listening. When these so-called intellectuals play their games with big words and make believe science and cause children to lose their simple faith I get very angry. The sky is just what it appears to be, kids. It's beautiful and simple and it hasn't ever changed. Oh, don't be led astray by this charlatan. If I were there in the studio I'd punch him good. Then he'd have plenty of time to look at the sky and come to his senses. - {click}"

He is bold and suave -- in his own mind. He could win girls easily, but he never gets up the nerve to try his moves on actual women. He knows that his world-view construct is shaky. He preaches it to himself and in any forum where he can escape rebuttal but knows better than to really try it out.

He thinks the whole world should be in accord with him. He's ready to spread his message at full volume with the straight-forward simplicity of barre chords. Again, though, he can't actually deliver the message, because if he were to touch ground and have to deal with the the messiness of real life, his whole life would be unmade. So he runs out of gas: he expires having used a lot of energy to ultimately do nothing.

He didn't even see it coming. He's been so frightened of losing his childish faith that death caught him unprepared.

The song is an admonition to grow up and beyond childish ways of thinking. The writer of Hebrews is upset about the same thing at the end of chapter five.

Posted to Interior Life at September 20, 2005 9:17 PM